Yesterday evening I drove to the beautiful village of Charney Bassett to be a guest author at a residential course on self-editing your writing, run by Cornerstones Literary Consultancy and given by my friend, Lee Weatherly. It was a good evening. I got to babble on about writing and answer questions and then afterwards we went to this nice pub for a chat outside in the cool evening air.
The writers/students were all very nice and had great questions and seemed perfectly willing to let an insane pregnant American woman talk to them about writing funny sexy books, which is always gratifying.
One thing, though, is starting to get to me this week, because it’s been coming at me from all directions (and this isn’t picking on anybody, I really have heard it over and over again, from journalists, acquaintances, aspiring writers, established writers, people who randomly contact me via email), is the same old question about Harlequin/Mills & Boon novels having a “formula” or a “format” or a “recipe”.
This question usually comes from people who haven’t read a romance novel, or at least not for years, so you can’t blame them for latching on to an urban legend. I mean, for a long time I believed that Mikey from the Life cereal commercials was killed by drinking Coke and eating Pop Rocks at the same time, so who am I to condemn people for their ill-founded beliefs?
I have to say that this week, my response has become very well-practised, and, of course, polite, because you know, if somebody had laughed at me for my Mikey-exploded belief I probably would have been offended (although still wrong).
However this is my blog and I can say what I like. So here it is:
THERE’S NO FORMULA, DAMMIT.
Romance novels need a hero and a heroine and a happy ending. What you do to get them there is your own damn choice. If you are writing for Harlequin/Mills & Boon you have to be aware of your audience’s requirements, because each branded book contains a promise to the reader that she will get a certain kind of story within wide parameters, but THIS IS NOT A FORMULA, it is genre requirements and marketing and you will be constrained by some kind of requirements in whatever the hell you write if you want to get published.
That is all.
(Oh, and Mikey is still alive.)
In other news, I’m going to the USA tomorrow and have to pack and also obsessively clean my house, which could be another reason why I’m a little bit cranky.
Julie – my latest from a well-educated journalist friend, (natch) was – you MUST have ‘written it cynically.’ I despair, I really do. Actually I could have cried. No one asks a crime writer why their books always have a crime, baddies, detectives and a resolution – do they?
Morning Julie
Sounds like you had a lovely evening. Hope you enjoy the trip to the RWA, and holiday, where you will be in the company of talented folks who understand that there is no formula to HMB. Calm. Cranky-free. And, yes, you may need to buy shoes.
Take care, relax, and see you soon.
Comfortable shoes and a ear protectors — the noise level does tend to resemble a WI outing on occasions. You know how it goes. The noise level rises gradually until everyone is shouting to make themselves heard.
Darn it, I decided not to go because of the heat. What happens — Wales decides to melt.
Give my love to everyone, Julie.
Looking forward to seeing you!!
But I think you’re wrong. There is a formula. Only one ingredient, too. It’s called good writing.
Julie — I hope I haven’t missed you yet, but can you email me? Someone is trying to get a hold of you, but the email message keeps bouncing.
Done it, Kris–I hope!
Michelle, would that be good writing…and Picnic bars?
Liz, I’ll give your love to everyone and I will cheer when your name is called at the Ritas!
Ray-Anne, cranky-free and new shoes would be nice.
Pip, there are always people like that…maybe she, too, was under the influence of hormones.
Have a safe trip, Julie! Can’t wait to see you at the literacy signing!
As for the ever popular “formulas”, I had no clue what someone was talking about the first time they asked me about them. I kept thinking… this isn’t physics!