My agent called me about One Night Stand, and she says it’s “85% there”. (She also said some very good things about it, but I’ll save those for my own personal satisfaction.) The problem isn’t the ending, which I was a little afraid of, as it ventures into some quite broad comedy; she liked the ending. Nor was it the beginning, which she’d said in a former draft was rather slow; I’d revised it. No, unfortunately my middle sags. The external plot disappears, and some of the scenes are quite similar in their setting and structure.
(Actually I was delighted with 85% of it being right, considering I wrote this book when very pregnant and with a newborn in the house. I’m not surprised the middle lacks a bit of imagination when really, all I could think about was breastfeeding.)
So I’ve spent this weekend (what time I didn’t spend waxing, see below) working on revisions.
First, I looked at the notes I wrote down while talking with her and I made a list of things to do.
Then I analysed what happened in the middle of the book. It really helps me to see things visually, so I drew a flow chart of each chapter and its events, and looked to see what sort of events these were. Sure enough, chapters 18-19, and 22-25, were all more or less about the developing relationship between the hero and heroine, with only a short interlude for chapters 20-1 to deal with external plot.
I decided that I didn’t want to cut the romance scenes, not wholescale anyway; they’ve got important emotional development in them, and besides, I like them. I decided instead to go with the assumption that the book itself isn’t slow-paced and lacking tension; it’s the reader’s perception of the book, because although things are happening (and happening fairly quickly), they’re the same sort of things.
So what I did instead was brought the external plot into this part of the book. I added a bit of a scene in chapter 19 that has nothing to do with the romance and happens in another town. I cut an external conflict scene from chapter 27 and put it, with some changes, in chapter 23. So now I have bits of external plot alternating with the romance. Hopefully that will keep up tension in both areas.
I did those things on Friday and Saturday and today; tomorrow I’m going to deal with the repetition issue, and I’ll blog about that then.
Hi Julie, Sympathies on the revisions (!) but it’s great to have that kind of objective feedback. I really admire your methodical approach to editing. I had to beef up my external plot too, amongst other things. Did you hear that Radio 4 Open Book programme last Sunday about revisions and editing? How everyone gets both sometime and how the process, however much we know it’s a VGT, can make even the most experienced and best-selling authors feel a bit “battered and bruised”? It made me feel better – and I am sure that ONS will be brilliant.
I’ve never had a book without revisions yet, Pip, though fortunately mostly they’ve been of the 15% variety. I’m always really pleased to get feedback from my agent or editors. I’m dreading the day I get wholescale revisions, because I know it will happen sometime.
However even when I feel like I’m doing the right thing, the crows of doubt always appear, because when you submit a novel the focus suddenly goes from pleasing yourself to pleasing someone else.
Thanks for telling me about that programme–I heard it was very good but haven’t had a chance to listen. Aside from waxing and revision, my life right now is baby and sleep.
Go Julie! You can do it!
I would be v frightened IF I didn’t get revisions.
The repetiiton, and scenes goig over the material, in similair places, with a similair structure is probably why you have the some of the sag. It is good that you can see what needs to be done.
Hooray for you!
Hi Julie, re: Little Black Dress. I went into the local Ottakers/ now Waterstones this morning for my fix [I was introduced to Rachel Gibson through LBD] – shock horror. No LBD display stand, nothing on the shelves. NOT ONE RACHEL GIBSON.
Oh, the assistant said, casually, we did not know where to put those books so they’re on the ,,, wait for it,,, erotic fiction shelf.
You know the one – back of the shop. one row. dingy.
One LBD – by J Cohen.
Were they selling?
Oh yes, but not lately.
Oh, really? When I protested their innocence, he did admit that they asked ‘ head office’ where to put them genre wise before the deed.
Worse. None of the three assistants had read the books, so no clue. They were apologetic and the service is good, but if they do not have the stock…
I left.
IN contrast, WHSmith had a full LBD card display at the front of the book department with all the latest LBD with a buy one get one free promotion. I bought many. Frabsious day! The Joy! And I had my HMB Romances at the same time.
Obviously this could be an isolated example.
I just hope that it is. Waterstones are a major bookseller, and I live in a busy large town and the shop is always packed. This does not bode well for the writers and the readers.
On with the revisions!
Take care, Ray-Anne
That is funny (and a little bit annoying), Ray-Anne.
The WH Smiths in Reading had Spirit Willing in the “teen reads” section. I removed them and explained to the salesperson that it’s not quite a teen read…